Dealing with a Depressed Friend


  • Take it seriously and don't ignore it — Approach your friend and, without judgment, let him or her know your concern. "I'm worried about the changes I've seen in you lately. I hope you won't blow me off or think I'm putting you down. I want us to be able to talk."
  • Listen actively — Sit facing your friend in a relaxed, open position. Keep eye contact and nod your head to show that you're paying attention. Paraphrase what you hear from your friend's perspective; "You felt hurt?" or "It sounds like you were really disappointed."
  • Describe your observations — "You've been missing class ... isolating yourself ... not eating ... don't seem happy ... drinking more ..."
  • Don't minimize your concern — If your friend says "Do you think I need help?" say "Yes, I do. That's a great idea. Can I stay with you while you call/walk to the Student Counseling Center to make an appointment?" 
  • Offer your recommendations — "I'm not sure, but I wonder if you're depressed. There's help available on campus. The Counseling Center offers confidential services. Would you like me to go with you to meet with someone?"



O’Hare Hall Basement
Phone: (718) 817-3725

McMahon Hall Room 211
Phone: (212) 636-6225

Room 203
Phone: (914) 637-3733



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